I am a snob.
I hate the Red River Ex.
I hate the scrubby looking carnies.
I hate the fourteen year old girls with daisy duke shorts hanging onto their twenty year old gap toothed boyfriends.
I hate paying four dollars for a glorified slurpee and six dollars for a hamburger.I hate the rigged 'games of chance'.
I hate the gate admission that means even if I do nothing else, I have just paid to watch the freaks that remind me how much of a snob I am.
I hate that it reminds me that I was the girl who sneered at the smoking patio girls in high school, quite confident that my life was going to be better than theirs because I was so smart.
I hate that I was obviously right in that assertion.
I hate seeing 35 year old grandmothers.
I hate seeing formerly famous bands having to force out one more show to pay off their debts.
I only like one thing, and that's seeing the little dogs jump thru hoops and go up ramps - I have the feeling they are the smartest animals at the Ex.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Friday, May 30, 2008
Carrie Samantha Miranda Charlotte
I went to the new ' Sex and the City' movie last night - opening night, and the question popped up: Which character are you most like?
Well, how about NONE of them?
Do I wear shoes by Manolo? No, they're from PayLess. My most expensive shoes are NewBalance runners in a 9 extra wide.
Do I sleep with random guys on a regular basis? Believe me, I'd tell you if I did. I ogle stroller-daddies sometimes, with their ironic tees and 2-day growth, but that's it.
Do I regret the glass ceiling restrictions on my career? No, but I regret the way Windex wipes leave streaks when they're not supposed to.
Do I have live in the lap of luxury with a Jewish husband? OY. No, I don't.
So, I have to ask myself what's so compelling about these characters? Well, first of all, they're characters.. extremes of several aspects of any woman's life. The desire for understanding and communication, the desire for sexual connection, the desire for personal achievement, the desire for family and harmony.
As long as there are women like me who are moving forward, there will be audiences for shows with fabulous characters like the Sex and The City girls.
I'm going to watch it again when it comes out on DVD, and if I'm at home, I'll just wear sweatpants and Crocs - way less pressure.
Well, how about NONE of them?
Do I wear shoes by Manolo? No, they're from PayLess. My most expensive shoes are NewBalance runners in a 9 extra wide.
Do I sleep with random guys on a regular basis? Believe me, I'd tell you if I did. I ogle stroller-daddies sometimes, with their ironic tees and 2-day growth, but that's it.
Do I regret the glass ceiling restrictions on my career? No, but I regret the way Windex wipes leave streaks when they're not supposed to.
Do I have live in the lap of luxury with a Jewish husband? OY. No, I don't.
So, I have to ask myself what's so compelling about these characters? Well, first of all, they're characters.. extremes of several aspects of any woman's life. The desire for understanding and communication, the desire for sexual connection, the desire for personal achievement, the desire for family and harmony.
As long as there are women like me who are moving forward, there will be audiences for shows with fabulous characters like the Sex and The City girls.
I'm going to watch it again when it comes out on DVD, and if I'm at home, I'll just wear sweatpants and Crocs - way less pressure.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Funny Lines
about a difficult situation: ' as uncomfortable as laying on a pull-out bed with your mother-in-law'
That line came to me last night!
That line came to me last night!
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Laying Fallow
Sometimes it's good to recharge your batteries and not run around so much. I missed a show last night but honestly it felt so good to just crash - I was in bed asleep at 9:30. I slept right til 7 so obviously I needed the rest.
Perhaps I need to rest my creative self too - or focus in a bit on it, not sure. I am not able to concentrate very well lately and end up trying to do too many things at once. I've actually been feeling quite stressed and not on top of things.
I've probably said it a million times, but I need to create a schedule so that I don't constantly get off track, when it comes to losing ' my time'. I really resent losing ' my time' to chores and house stuff. The kids' stuff I don't necessarily resent - it's caretaking, but already this week I've spent about 10 hours shuttling them back and forth to appointments, and it's only Wednesday.
I'm going to do my ' 27 item toss' now, Thanks FlyLady!
Less is more.
Perhaps I need to rest my creative self too - or focus in a bit on it, not sure. I am not able to concentrate very well lately and end up trying to do too many things at once. I've actually been feeling quite stressed and not on top of things.
I've probably said it a million times, but I need to create a schedule so that I don't constantly get off track, when it comes to losing ' my time'. I really resent losing ' my time' to chores and house stuff. The kids' stuff I don't necessarily resent - it's caretaking, but already this week I've spent about 10 hours shuttling them back and forth to appointments, and it's only Wednesday.
I'm going to do my ' 27 item toss' now, Thanks FlyLady!
Less is more.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Why Are You Looking At Me Like That?
Stop it.
I said Stop It.
You're squinting like you can see through me.
The problem is not that you can see through me, but that I am transparent.
The problem is that I can see through you, and it makes you uncomfortable.
I said Stop It.
You're squinting like you can see through me.
The problem is not that you can see through me, but that I am transparent.
The problem is that I can see through you, and it makes you uncomfortable.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
June is Heating Up
June never fails to disappoint - I am looking ahead to the next few weeks in awe and wonder, as in ' Aw, I wonder how I'm possibly going to do all this!'
Between kids' spring sports, recitals, school field trips, medical and dental appointments, birthdays and anniversaries, June is shaping up to be a full month. Oh, and then there are SHOWS too! And Dad's doing some stuff too, let's not forget Dad. Dad's actually running the full marathon on Father's Day, and then we'll dope him up good with Advil so he can sit through the dance recital later that afternoon.
I'm doing a show at the Charley ( Charleswood Hotel ) on June 16th and turning into a makeshift birthday party. My real birthday celebration will probably take place alongside my friend Marni, who is also turning 40 this year, and who has organized a big lawn party shindig to take place in a couple of weeks. I've been thinking about what gift to get her, even though she said no gifts. I would love to write her a tribute since she's been such an awesome friend for so long. I started jotting down some ideas today. The present I'm getting for my birthday is a trip to Las Vegas - my first time! I've got tickets for Bette Midler's 'Showgirl' show and also Cirque Du Soleil. Rick's coming along and while we're there we'll kill two birds with one stone and celebrate our 20th anniversary.
It's teacher-gift season too, once again and I have been rather lax about organizing anything at school for the past several months. Next year I'll know better than to sign myself up to be class rep for two classes. Their teachers have been great though, and I'll try to come up with something that the kids can do to help show their appreciation.
With the twins' birthday and my birthday happening day after each other, mid-June is always a scramble to find time and energy to get a party together. Honestly my birthday has mostly fallen by the wayside, but usually there are a few girlfriends who will take me out for lunch, and that's the best kind of celebration anyway. Love every one of those girls! There are many days I would quite willingly just move into a kibbutz with all my gals and live in a matriarchal society. I hope I'm wearing off enough on my boys for them to turn into decent men.
Stuart made me laugh yesterday, like he does almost every day. We went to see Indiana Jones 4, the new movie, and we applauded at the end, but we were the only ones in the theatre clapping. He turned around and looked at the rest of the people and said, ' This is a movie theatre, not a jury!' Hahahha.. what could be funnier than an 8 yr old boy.
We're still hustling Avery to basketball games and Cadets until the end of June too, and then it will all come to an abrupt end. I do tend to dread the 'free' days of summer, only because having your kids home for summer holidays is a bit like taking a vacation with your boss. It's no vacation for me. As much as I enjoy spending time with my kids, I need to make a concentrated effort to split them up because they're like dogs, and they tend to turn on each other after too long together. One minute they're play fighting and the next minute it turns out that the growling and biting is quite real. Then I threaten them with the two words they fear most - Day Care.
The plan is to take them out to the woods as much as possible this summer - even if that means I have to suck up my extraordinary dislike of confined sleeping arrangements. Most other things about camping I can cope with, but having to listen to my husband bark orders in a nylon house just about pushes me over the edge. I would quite willingly get lost in the forest for a day if it meant I had peace and quiet.
I can't even commit to the next sentence, so I backspaced and deleted it. I was about to say I was going to start a cleanse, but I am so fearful of giving up foods I love and am used to using for comfort. It truly is addictive behaviour when you look at it. I have to change the way I eat if I hope to make any inroads on my weight problem. * Sigh *
Last night I saw RUSH and I think Geddy Lee is my new weight loss idol. He is so energetic and full of life and in good shape for a man in his 50s. Not to mention he is doing what he loves.
I'm really tired right now so this may not have been the most 'together' blog, but at least you can see what's lying ahead of me for the next few weeks. I'll keep writing, if only to draw up some ideas for the show on June 16th.
Between kids' spring sports, recitals, school field trips, medical and dental appointments, birthdays and anniversaries, June is shaping up to be a full month. Oh, and then there are SHOWS too! And Dad's doing some stuff too, let's not forget Dad. Dad's actually running the full marathon on Father's Day, and then we'll dope him up good with Advil so he can sit through the dance recital later that afternoon.
I'm doing a show at the Charley ( Charleswood Hotel ) on June 16th and turning into a makeshift birthday party. My real birthday celebration will probably take place alongside my friend Marni, who is also turning 40 this year, and who has organized a big lawn party shindig to take place in a couple of weeks. I've been thinking about what gift to get her, even though she said no gifts. I would love to write her a tribute since she's been such an awesome friend for so long. I started jotting down some ideas today. The present I'm getting for my birthday is a trip to Las Vegas - my first time! I've got tickets for Bette Midler's 'Showgirl' show and also Cirque Du Soleil. Rick's coming along and while we're there we'll kill two birds with one stone and celebrate our 20th anniversary.
It's teacher-gift season too, once again and I have been rather lax about organizing anything at school for the past several months. Next year I'll know better than to sign myself up to be class rep for two classes. Their teachers have been great though, and I'll try to come up with something that the kids can do to help show their appreciation.
With the twins' birthday and my birthday happening day after each other, mid-June is always a scramble to find time and energy to get a party together. Honestly my birthday has mostly fallen by the wayside, but usually there are a few girlfriends who will take me out for lunch, and that's the best kind of celebration anyway. Love every one of those girls! There are many days I would quite willingly just move into a kibbutz with all my gals and live in a matriarchal society. I hope I'm wearing off enough on my boys for them to turn into decent men.
Stuart made me laugh yesterday, like he does almost every day. We went to see Indiana Jones 4, the new movie, and we applauded at the end, but we were the only ones in the theatre clapping. He turned around and looked at the rest of the people and said, ' This is a movie theatre, not a jury!' Hahahha.. what could be funnier than an 8 yr old boy.
We're still hustling Avery to basketball games and Cadets until the end of June too, and then it will all come to an abrupt end. I do tend to dread the 'free' days of summer, only because having your kids home for summer holidays is a bit like taking a vacation with your boss. It's no vacation for me. As much as I enjoy spending time with my kids, I need to make a concentrated effort to split them up because they're like dogs, and they tend to turn on each other after too long together. One minute they're play fighting and the next minute it turns out that the growling and biting is quite real. Then I threaten them with the two words they fear most - Day Care.
The plan is to take them out to the woods as much as possible this summer - even if that means I have to suck up my extraordinary dislike of confined sleeping arrangements. Most other things about camping I can cope with, but having to listen to my husband bark orders in a nylon house just about pushes me over the edge. I would quite willingly get lost in the forest for a day if it meant I had peace and quiet.
I can't even commit to the next sentence, so I backspaced and deleted it. I was about to say I was going to start a cleanse, but I am so fearful of giving up foods I love and am used to using for comfort. It truly is addictive behaviour when you look at it. I have to change the way I eat if I hope to make any inroads on my weight problem. * Sigh *
Last night I saw RUSH and I think Geddy Lee is my new weight loss idol. He is so energetic and full of life and in good shape for a man in his 50s. Not to mention he is doing what he loves.
I'm really tired right now so this may not have been the most 'together' blog, but at least you can see what's lying ahead of me for the next few weeks. I'll keep writing, if only to draw up some ideas for the show on June 16th.
Friday, May 23, 2008
Trolls
One of my frequent stops is http://www.newwinnipeg.com where anything Winnipeg-related can be discussed: politics, urban issues, entertainment, etc.
I enjoy reading the discussions and also participating, and have learned quite a bit about our city that I may not have otherwise known. I've also found that there are people all around who just live for the opportunity to put others down anyway they can.
For those forum trolls that have nothing better to do than to leave nasty comments on threads and then pretend that they are misunderstood, I say, think two seconds before you hit the 'enter' key on that comment. After you've said it is too late to start retracting and explaining your real meaning of what you said.
I hate that it stirs up the fight in me, but it does.
Now I need to take a quick walk around the neighbourhood to shake off the troll.
I enjoy reading the discussions and also participating, and have learned quite a bit about our city that I may not have otherwise known. I've also found that there are people all around who just live for the opportunity to put others down anyway they can.
For those forum trolls that have nothing better to do than to leave nasty comments on threads and then pretend that they are misunderstood, I say, think two seconds before you hit the 'enter' key on that comment. After you've said it is too late to start retracting and explaining your real meaning of what you said.
I hate that it stirs up the fight in me, but it does.
Now I need to take a quick walk around the neighbourhood to shake off the troll.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Any Press Is Good
When you're trying to become a known name in comedy, any press is good press. Now it's not exactly a media blitz, but in the past 2 months I have had a television interview, a newspaper article and now a mention in Canadian Living magazine. The funny thing is, the one that is getting the most attention is the interview I did for CL last winter about living with depression which has just been published in their May issue. I think it's important for me to talk about depression, because it has affected me for such a long time and in so many ways.
I used to think the antidote to depression was to live with joy, but the chemicals in my brain didn't quite get that message, so I added a little prescription into the mix. Currently it's Wellbutrin that's giving me the boost of serotonin - but connecting with people is what really gets me going. You all are my second prescription.
Last night on PBS.org they broadcast a show called ' Depression - Out of the Shadows', and one of the panel speakers made a very good point about mental illness not yet being a ' Tuna Casserole disease'. He further explained that people will rush to help those women who are suffering from breast cancer or another physical illness, showing up with casseroles and offers of help, while those affected by mental illness are left isolated and struggling. This has certainly been my personal experience, and that's not for a lack of good friends, it's just that no one is ever quite sure what to do or how to help. And it's society's view still that somehow mental illness is the fault of the individual; I'm still trying to shake off that belief myself!
Even though I've always been open with people who cared enough to ask, I guess the cat's out of the bag now nationally! I sympathize with others who have to fight this dark cloud - and believe it or not, there are days when I am actually thankful for it. You can only see your shadow in the sunshine.
I used to think the antidote to depression was to live with joy, but the chemicals in my brain didn't quite get that message, so I added a little prescription into the mix. Currently it's Wellbutrin that's giving me the boost of serotonin - but connecting with people is what really gets me going. You all are my second prescription.
Last night on PBS.org they broadcast a show called ' Depression - Out of the Shadows', and one of the panel speakers made a very good point about mental illness not yet being a ' Tuna Casserole disease'. He further explained that people will rush to help those women who are suffering from breast cancer or another physical illness, showing up with casseroles and offers of help, while those affected by mental illness are left isolated and struggling. This has certainly been my personal experience, and that's not for a lack of good friends, it's just that no one is ever quite sure what to do or how to help. And it's society's view still that somehow mental illness is the fault of the individual; I'm still trying to shake off that belief myself!
Even though I've always been open with people who cared enough to ask, I guess the cat's out of the bag now nationally! I sympathize with others who have to fight this dark cloud - and believe it or not, there are days when I am actually thankful for it. You can only see your shadow in the sunshine.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Garbage Day 2
It's Wednesday, Garbage Day 2, School Day 6.
It is 8:56 a.m. and I am shallow breathing.
Rolled out of bed exactly 46 minutes ago.
Children in underwear eating Cheerios with sloshing milk in family room.
Dishes left exactly where they lay last night as I went out the door.
Empty lunch bags on the counter, at least they were unpacked.
Stare into fridge.
Stare into pantry.
Bend awkwardly into pantry searching for juiceboxes.
Carefully customize inventory of leftovers and sundry items to create 3 nutritious tasty lunches.
Realize same two underwear-clad children are watching Daily Planet.
Shoo children upstairs to get dressed.
Remind oldest child to give a hoot about the nutrition needs of his silent pets.
Load lunch bags into backpacks.
Encourage sad child who doesn't want to go to school.
Silently pray the child will cooperate, mentally making a checklist of my planned activities.
Physically dress an 8 year old child who is built like a human ferret.
Curse tube socks.
Recognize but slightly ignore tears in his eyes, for fear of unleashing the torrent.
Say good bye one by one to the three boys .. and watch the last teary one shuffle across the grass.
Sit down at the computer with a severe crunch in my chest and stuff on my mind.
Phone Rings.
Small voice says, " Mom, I need my collage today. It's in the kitchen. "
" I'll bring it," I say, " and I'll see you this afternoon - I'm coming to the Volunteer Appreciation Party, your choir is singing."
" Dang," singing boy says, " I forgot choir again."
" It's okay", says Mom
It is 8:56 a.m. and I am shallow breathing.
Rolled out of bed exactly 46 minutes ago.
Children in underwear eating Cheerios with sloshing milk in family room.
Dishes left exactly where they lay last night as I went out the door.
Empty lunch bags on the counter, at least they were unpacked.
Stare into fridge.
Stare into pantry.
Bend awkwardly into pantry searching for juiceboxes.
Carefully customize inventory of leftovers and sundry items to create 3 nutritious tasty lunches.
Realize same two underwear-clad children are watching Daily Planet.
Shoo children upstairs to get dressed.
Remind oldest child to give a hoot about the nutrition needs of his silent pets.
Load lunch bags into backpacks.
Encourage sad child who doesn't want to go to school.
Silently pray the child will cooperate, mentally making a checklist of my planned activities.
Physically dress an 8 year old child who is built like a human ferret.
Curse tube socks.
Recognize but slightly ignore tears in his eyes, for fear of unleashing the torrent.
Say good bye one by one to the three boys .. and watch the last teary one shuffle across the grass.
Sit down at the computer with a severe crunch in my chest and stuff on my mind.
Phone Rings.
Small voice says, " Mom, I need my collage today. It's in the kitchen. "
" I'll bring it," I say, " and I'll see you this afternoon - I'm coming to the Volunteer Appreciation Party, your choir is singing."
" Dang," singing boy says, " I forgot choir again."
" It's okay", says Mom
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
School Daze
June is quickly approaching and I find myself in the typical position of figuring out how to amuse and inspire three children over the nine-week school holiday; a daunting thought since most days I find it difficult to amuse and inspire myself. The last thing any parent wants is for their child to turn out just like them. Sheesh, that was depressing.
I have a feeling this summer may be different, only because for the past eight months I too have been a student. It's been a long time since I was in any formal classes but this year I did endeavour to learn some new tricks, improv specifically. With Prairie Theatre Exchange for 20 weeks I immersed myself in something different - studying longform improv with Stephen Sim. It was some of the best money I've ever spent, to learn alongside some very talented young people and to expand my own performance ability. Honestly I hadn't even entertained the thought ( excuse the pun) of performing.. since high school, where I had the occasional chance to take part in plays, and even then, I didn't exactly throw myself into it. I still have that sense of holding back, and if there's one thing I could UNlearn, it would be that.
I have seen so much in the past few years that is inspiring; friends who have followed their creative dreams and reaped the benefits, and even looking back to see where I'm standing today compared to two years ago when I made the choice to step up to a microphone with my baby wit. I think I might be ready to grow up soon, recognize what contribution I am capable of, and stop holding back.
Then, and just then, may I be the inspiring model for my children that is in my mind's eye.
I have a feeling this summer may be different, only because for the past eight months I too have been a student. It's been a long time since I was in any formal classes but this year I did endeavour to learn some new tricks, improv specifically. With Prairie Theatre Exchange for 20 weeks I immersed myself in something different - studying longform improv with Stephen Sim. It was some of the best money I've ever spent, to learn alongside some very talented young people and to expand my own performance ability. Honestly I hadn't even entertained the thought ( excuse the pun) of performing.. since high school, where I had the occasional chance to take part in plays, and even then, I didn't exactly throw myself into it. I still have that sense of holding back, and if there's one thing I could UNlearn, it would be that.
I have seen so much in the past few years that is inspiring; friends who have followed their creative dreams and reaped the benefits, and even looking back to see where I'm standing today compared to two years ago when I made the choice to step up to a microphone with my baby wit. I think I might be ready to grow up soon, recognize what contribution I am capable of, and stop holding back.
Then, and just then, may I be the inspiring model for my children that is in my mind's eye.
Monday, May 19, 2008
More Than One Way to Skin A Cat
Keeping in touch with your friends used to be hard work - it required paper, pen, stamps and patience. A few sheets of foolscap, a Bic pen, a stamp and there was your mass communication; I never would have dared photocopy a letter and send the same one to two different friends - how rude!
Fast forward to this moment where in a few minutes I am able to broadcast my thoughts to just about anyone who cares to read them. How Star Trek of me. Tomorrow I'll beam into your kitchen to see if you have any chili powder I can borrow, I'm all out. You know me, I never read to the end of the recipe before I start cooking, but then again, you don't love me because I'm thorough - that's my husband's trait - you love me because I am impulsive and somewhat reckless and maybe even in my wildest dreams a rebel.
So here it is, the newly-birthed blog of the Defiant Scribbler, and it comes with a teenytiny definition:
The Defiant Scribbler is: Heather Witherden, mother of three young boys who also used to spontaneously scribble as they looked over their toddler shoulders, laughing at their mother, who more often than not, would be laughing too, until she looked over HER shoulder to see her husband, who wasn't laughing. Oh dear.
Now that the small scribblers are in school, the Senior Scribbler took to the internet and reformed her letter-writing into a new electronic format, and also to the stages of small clubs and theatres and community centres wherever they'd have her. A hobby/career/dream was borne of years of tales and tears. I love alliteration and elocution, spoken-word poetry, lyrical speech and stand-up comedy.
If you're here, chances are you've met me in person, but if not, welcome to my electronic clone; you'll probably find her alternatingly sweet and sour.
Fast forward to this moment where in a few minutes I am able to broadcast my thoughts to just about anyone who cares to read them. How Star Trek of me. Tomorrow I'll beam into your kitchen to see if you have any chili powder I can borrow, I'm all out. You know me, I never read to the end of the recipe before I start cooking, but then again, you don't love me because I'm thorough - that's my husband's trait - you love me because I am impulsive and somewhat reckless and maybe even in my wildest dreams a rebel.
So here it is, the newly-birthed blog of the Defiant Scribbler, and it comes with a teenytiny definition:
The Defiant Scribbler is: Heather Witherden, mother of three young boys who also used to spontaneously scribble as they looked over their toddler shoulders, laughing at their mother, who more often than not, would be laughing too, until she looked over HER shoulder to see her husband, who wasn't laughing. Oh dear.
Now that the small scribblers are in school, the Senior Scribbler took to the internet and reformed her letter-writing into a new electronic format, and also to the stages of small clubs and theatres and community centres wherever they'd have her. A hobby/career/dream was borne of years of tales and tears. I love alliteration and elocution, spoken-word poetry, lyrical speech and stand-up comedy.
If you're here, chances are you've met me in person, but if not, welcome to my electronic clone; you'll probably find her alternatingly sweet and sour.
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